Ari Kopel

Making Peace with the Negative Aspects of Ourselves

In Uncategorized on May 4, 2015 at 9:40 pm

One of my friends shared a video with me on Facebook. I don’t have a lot of time to look at all the posts and shares. But something she said in the post made me stop and take two minutes of my time to explore it. She stated, “Dang, these awesome commercials… Get me every time!”

I said to myself, “What the heck” and clicked on it.

I couldn’t hold back the tears. It got me! And despite the fact that it’s a commercial for a major corporation, trying to get us to become a customer, the message in this video is very real and touched me in a very profound way.

Sad little girl in the bed close-upI have been that parent. Maybe you have been too! I struggled and was beaten down. At times, I didn’t eat to give my kids a meal. I didn’t have the money to get them Christmas presents or new clothes. I couldn’t afford birthday parties or birthday gifts. I was angry that I couldn’t get a job because I was over-qualified. I was short-tempered and stressed.  I didn’t know what I could do to get out of this abysmal situation. And I often wondered how I may have affected my children, how they perceived me, what traumas I may have caused them or what deep wounds may have formed into scars .

Life isn’t easy. It is a battle to exist in a world that is out of balance and unjust. It tests us lacrimaand pushes us to the brink of breaking us. But by leading us to that point of almost breaking us, we also have the ability to bend like a tree and thus weather the storm.

The negative aspects of life then become our teacher and help to strengthen us by providing opportunities that we wouldn’t have chosen on our own. I know I wouldn’t have elected to experience the negative situations in my life. I shy away from pain of any kind, as most do. But the pain and struggle found me and kept following me during a period in my life where I was most vulnerable, and it forced me to make choices. Some of the choices were not good ones. They led me to dead-ends or other negative experiences. Then there are those choices that were spot on. These opened doors that I didn’t even know were possible for me. I was now able to be in appreciation of my new, positive situations and have a better understanding of the circumstances leading me there.

The lesson, I think, is to understand that we’re not perfect; that we’ll lie; that we’ll fail; that we’ll hurt others and ourselves – and that we can forgive ourselves for all of that. We’re here to experience how this all works. Sometimes we get it right the first time, and sometimes it will take numerous attempts. In the end, we’ll all be OK.

I see my children now, and I sigh, teary-eyed, grateful of how extraordinary they’ve turned out. I guess despite all the hang-ups and insecurities, all the failures and let-downs, I didn’t do such a bad job after all.  And some of my choices, as bad as they seemed at the time, were the right ones.

So, trust in the process called Life. It’s better to not over-think your life or analyze the “why” of things. Let go and let God. When you’re in that mindset, things have a funny way of fixing themselves and aligning to the Divine Plan. We just have to get out of the way!

To learn more how negative experiences serve as tools for our Spiritual Mastery, get your copy of Spiritual Warfare & The Art of Deception: The Hijacking of Spirituality on The book is now an International Bestseller!


Order Here

To sign up for my second book: Getting Back to Source: Tools for Connection, Protection & Empowerment, go to BOOKS and fill out the subscription form. The book launches late Summer.

– Ari Kopel

Editorial Note:  The concepts presented in this article are taken from the book Spiritual Warfare & The Art of Deception: The Hijacking of Spirituality available now on Amazon.

 About the Author

vieja_loca_22Ari Kopel is a graduate of the University of Miami with a major in psychology and minor in communications. While at the University of Miami, she worked as an assistant to Dr. Cesare Emiliani in the Harold C. Urey Laboratory for Paleotemperature Research, on projects involving the study of Pole Shifts and Ice Ages. She later attended Columbia University, New York, for her graduate studies and worked as the assistant to Dr. Robert Jastrow, director of the NASA Goddard Institute for Space Studies, New York, while also serving as Jastrow’s teaching assistant at Dartmouth College, NH.

Ari is the author of the new book Getting Back to Source: Tools for Connection, Protection & Empowerment; the founder of, and the radio show host and creator of “Shattering the Matrix” on
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